Mando.org

Between holiday travel and work and “work”, I’ve been busily neglecting my posting here. It’s always easy to let the daily grind distract you from more meaningful things, but in light of the terrible tragedy in Southeast Asia here’s a minor post:

The South-East Asia Earthquake and Tsunami weblog is a great resource for people looking for a way to help those that need it the most. I’ve given what I can and I ask that you do the same.

Word Press starting freaking out today, so to those of you whose RSS readers got pinged a couple too many times today, I apologize. It’s been taken care of and won’t happen again .

For those interested, Climb To The Stars has the fix and more info about the problem.

What about God? Where is He in your picture of life?

Faith used to be enough for me, really. Years ago, things like the problem of pain and suffering didn’t phase me at all. My faith was like a rock: solid and unmoving. “God has his reasons”, I’d say. And that was enough for me. It honestly was.

Things are different now that I’m older and a bit wiser. Well, probably not wiser, but maybe more aware of how dumb I am . Things that were once clear have been clouded by life and circumstance.

But I do know a few things. I know that I love my family more than anything in this world. No price is too high to pay for their safety: no sacrifce too great to keep them happy. I also know that my love for my family is merely a shadow of God’s love for the world. And that’s enough for me.

The way I see it, Jesus told us to do 2 things in this life: Love God with all our being, and love our neighbors as ourselves. Everything else follows from that. I used to be a real stickler for the legalistic details, but I like to think that I’m getting better at seeing the difference between what a person does and who that person is.

Do I love God? Absolutely. I used to love Him because I was afraid to do otherwise, but things have changed over the years. The more I learn about Him, the more my knowledge is stripped away, leaving my faith raw and exposed underneath.

Martial artists have an anecdote that might help clear up my foggy metaphor. When you begin studying, you learn how to punch. You take your hand and hurl it at the target. And that’s a punch.

The more you study the more you analyze your punches. There are about a bazillion different types of punches, each one unique. You’ve got crosses, jabs, hooks, reverse, overhand, blah blah blah. You study each punch individually, learning where they’re applicable and how to use them efficiently. You think about them so much that you reach a point where you can’t punch without completely analyzing the situation.

Then, one day, you realize that a punch is just a punch. You take your hand and hurl it at the target.

My relationship with God is getting like that. I learn more and more about Him, only to have it stripped away and replaced with love for Him and love for mankind. And I think I like it that way.

Dear God,

Amen.

For more about Hayley, please visit her website. But most of all, please pray for her and her family.

What would you like to be doing in 10 years?

Kids change you, you know. One minute you’re focusing on your dreams, goals and ambitions. Your life revolves around you, and your conversation belies this fact:

“I think I’m going to…”
“You know what I really want?…”
“Sometimes, my…”

We’ve been parents for almost 4 years now, and one of the very few things I’ve learned is that once you have kids, your life is no longer your own. Those Is and mys turn in into we and our real fast. I don’t think about where I’d like to go on vacation anymore: I think about where we can go as a family. I don’t think about my goals and dreams (much) : I think about what I can do to help my kids reach their goals and fulfill their dreams.

So, where do I want to be in 10 years? I have no idea.

But in 10 years, my oldest son will be 13, one year away from high school. His younger brother will be 9 and about to enter middle school. What do I need to do to prepare for that? Is it even possible to prepare?

I guess all we can do is love our kids, keep a roof over their heads and their bellies full, and pray.

Lots and lots of praying.

What do you think about your tomorrow? What about your two sons that carry the family name? Where do you see them in 20 years:)?

When I was younger, I never really enjoyed thinking about the future. I didn’t have a good idea of what I wanted to do with my life, so I tried to avoid the topic as much as possible. After high school I didn’t know what to do, so I went to college.

I didn’t know what I wanted to study in college, so I tried just about everything, much to my parents’ dismay . The college life never really stuck, and I found a job that I could both enjoy and excel at, so I dropped out and started working full-time.

That was last night, I swear.

This morning, I woke up and 6 years had gone by.

I’m now a father and a husband. I love my wife and my kids more than anything in this world, but I know that I could be both a better father and husband. I’m not as patient or understanding as I should be and at times I’ve let my temper get the best of me. I try everyday to keep myself in line, but I fail more than I should.

I’m also a working professional with a nice office and nice responsibilities. But I’m also lazy and I rest on my laurels instead of pushing myself to produce the truly great software I know I’m capable of writing. I also turn a blind eye to certain problems and issues that I should really address.

I’m also somewhat limited by my lack of a degree, which can be incredibly frustrating. When I had the opportunity and means to go to school I had no desire to do so: now full of desire but have neither the time nor the means. Not having a degree isn’t the end of the world, but it would help open doors that are otherwise closed.

What’s going to happen tomorrow? I couldn’t tell you. But here’s what I’d like to happen:

I’ll wake up tomorrow morning and it’ll be Aiden’s wedding day. He’ll be marrying a beautiful young woman that loves him as much as my wife loves me. Dominic will stand beside him as best man, which is fitting because they’ve been best friends all their lives. My father will perform the ceremony, and my mom and my wife will be sitting next to each other in the front row, dabbing at the corners of their eyes and holding hands.

All of our friends and family will be there to bless the new bride and groom, and we’ll all celebrate late into the evening. Then, at the end of the night, once everyone’s left the reception hall, my wife and I will find ourselves on the dance floor with our song playing softly in the background.

And we’ll dance and dance and dance.

My Dad left a comment on the last story about things that he’d like to see me talk about, so I’ll dedicate the next series of posts to as many of them as I can.

Here’s the pertinent text of the comment for the extremely lazy :

What do you think about your tomorrow? What about your two sons that carry the family name? Where do you see them in 20 years:)?

What would you like to be doing in 10 years? What about God. Where is He in your picture of life?

Are you abiding? What about Tracy. Are you doing everything you can to make her feel special and appreciated?

Just some thoughts about what I’d like to see on your blog. I ran across the following passage from the bible yesterday and cried.

Hosea 11:8 NLT “Oh, how can I give you up, Israel? How can I let you go? How can I destroy you like Admah and Zeboiim? My heart is torn within me, and my compassion overflows. 9No, I will not punish you as much as my burning anger tells me to. I will not completely destroy Israel, for I am God and not a mere mortal. I am the Holy One living among you, and I will not come to destroy.

10″For someday the people will follow the LORD. I will roar like a lion, and my people will return trembling from the west. 11Like a flock of birds, they will come from Egypt. Flying like doves, they will return from Assyria. And I will bring them home again,” says the LORD.

Do I really want to be a game developer?

Probably. They say it’s a young person’s game, though, and I’m not getting any younger. Maybe I’ll just have to be content with playing the games rather than trying to make them .

On another note, I’d like to make sure that everyone that reads this weblog knows that they can click on the Comments link at the bottom of each post and, well, comment. I was looking at my traffic yesterday, so I know that someone reads this thing. I’d like to hear from you guys every now and then so I don’t feel like I’m just talking to myself .

Aiden’s surgery went well and he’s resting at home. We had a bit of a high fever scare yesterday, but a quick trip to the ER calmed us down.

He doesn’t seem to be in a lot of pain, for which we’re unexpressably grateful. He’s a bit lethargic, but I imagine that’s from the trauma of the surgery combined with the Tylenol w/Codine. Of course, mentioning some strawberry ice cream wakes him right up

Aiden’s going into surgery tomorrow to get his tonsils removed.

Please keep him in your thoughts and prayers.